Getting Over

I've got to say, I think I've been feeling a little better about things.  I'm not missing that person at all.  Although things have gotten tough here and there, I know God has paved a new road for me and I will achieve some sort of joy and happiness in my life.

The lesson I learned about my situation is that I can't control any one's action except my own.  i know, i know, I should have known that from the start but I felt like I knew what i was doing.  When in a relationship, after a while it becomes symbiotic. 

A life where one has a hard time surviving if the other isn't attached.  It makes you a bigger person once the other becomes a leech and starts to drain the life out of you.  Doing stupid things that are both disloyal and disrespectful.

I've been told by some of my closest friends/family to "Snap out of it!"  My usual response was "It's easier said than done."  I know most of you can relate to this but I couldn't.  It was harder than it looks.  I've been blessed.  The storm has completely passed me and I'm looking forward to just being me again.

During the last 5 years, I have lost friend, friendships and a good amount of trust.  Although I feel I had nothing to do with the reasons for my losses, I will take responsibility, if any.  I could have been nicer, could have gone out more, could have let people vent etc.....  

The coulda, shoulda, wouldas are in the past and I really don't want to deal with them now.  What I'm basically saying people is that, I've grown since all this has happened, I may revert a bit every once in a while but I think that I have every right do do that. 

To all that read this, Please have faith that I will be better and I thank all of you that were there when I needed you the most.  Even in the smallest of ways.  That smile that you made me do for telling that stupid joke or even that response to a comment I made.  I know you are there.

To those that like to INFLICT there "Tough Love" on me.  Well, you obviously know that I need it and are not afraid to accept my responses to them as well.  Thank you.