Thursday, August 18, 2011

My court date

It's been a while since I posted a blog.  This is more for me to have as a record.  On august 17th, 2011,
I had a date in court.  It was to determine, by the judge, an order of visitation for the kids to visit Texas for two weeks with their mother.

Prior to the court date, my children were interviewed by each individuals lawyers to express what they are feeling about the case and what they want as an outcome.  Without prvocation, my children express to me that they didn't want to go to Texas, more so that they didn't want to meet their mothers boyfriend.

I go to court with the anticipation that everything will be fine and that te Judge will not send them to Texas because the children refuse to go.  When I get there to my surprise my, hopefully soon-to-be ex-wife, is there with her boyfriend.  Having been caught off guard, it REALLY upset me.

I sat down to wait to report in and I sent her a text message.  "That is distastefully disrespectful.  I would have NEVER done that to you, Thank you".  She had nothing to say.  Honestly, I've been told that since it bothered me so much, I must still have feelings for her.

Well, I have news for you guys that said that.  She is still my wife and we just got seperated from a 16 year marriage.  She is the mother of my children and we have many wonderful memories together.  The WHOLE marriage wasn't bad.  It was just the last few years.

So, OF COURSE!  I still love her.  It doesn't mean I want her back andrekindle what we have.  It just means that at one point in our lives we took care of each other and the family!  Anyway, I'm getting off track.  The news that the judge didn't come in to work came and I got happy.

This means that the kids are staying in NY.  After the news, I asked her from a distance if I can speak to her.  Her lawyer saw that and immediately came to represent her.  My lawyer never showed up by the way.  He wasn't supposed to talk to me.

They asked me that since she was only in NY one day, can she visit with the kids.  I was upset.  I explained that what she did was disrespectful and in the midst of aggresive lawyering, I told HER that I would let her know.  I spoke to my brother and he convinced me that its for the kids.

I called her back and told her that she can pick up the kids at 2 and have them back by 6pm.  The only condition was that she follow what her lawyer suggested and have her boyfriend not with her when she is with the kids.  After talking to the kids, they were happy about not going to Texas but still didn't want to meet him.

She agreed and picked them up.  She came back an hour late and the kids told me he showed up and their mother made them promise that they don't tell me that he did,  My daughter was very upset and crying when she got home.  My son was angry because he was forced to meet him when he didn't want to.

I know this long.  I'm very upset for my kids.  I still wonder what was it that I did in my lifetime to be disrespected and abused the way this woman has been doing.  There are a few of you that side with her.  that's fine.  Everyone is entitled to there own opinion.  I just wish that you can walk a mile in my shoes before coming up with one.

6 comments:

  1. In my experience, kids usually don't care whether they meet their parents new partner or not. They just want to spend time with the absent parent. Not saying that you have put it in their heads to not want to meet him but if you are that is wrong!! She is obviously sending you a message that she has moved on and so should you.. You need to realize the anger & hurtful feelings are coming from you. Kids just want to see their parents especially when their is a divorce going on. As you said she is STILL YOUR WIFE and YOU STILL LOVE HER, so obviously you are very hurt by all of this and in order to get her back & possibly hurt her, you keep the kids from her, especially knowing that she will have her boyfriend around.. Why cant the kids go to Texas?? Because her boyfriend is there?? You are wrong dude.. You should be telling the kids that they should in fact go to Texas for 2 weeks in the summer and spend time with their mom.. In fact, you can use that "break" and do something for yourself.. Im not trying to come down hard on you but you need to move on & get over this & let the kids see their mom.. You should encourage them to see their mom always and I m only talking from experience.. The kids will resent you later.Good luck dude!

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  2. The only thing I could say is put it in God hands let him lead you to what should be done so no one in the end gets hurt.

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  3. Dude MOVE ON ALREADY! Its terrible if your planting the seed in your kids heads regarding their Mother and her new Boyfriend. If he hasnt done anything to You then give him the Benefit of the Doubt. This Man might wind up permanantly in Your X Wifes life which means he will be around Your kids ALOT. Same thing goes for whoever You move on with She needs to accept Your X Wife is going to be in the Picture as well. You said You were DISREPECTED. How its been over for a while now Hes not there to Get in Your Face but to support Her thats it . Be an example to Your Kids Man Up, Suck It In stop playing the Victim, and most important dont use Facebook to Air Your Dirty Laundry, thats not how You Protect Your Children's Privacy.Surround Yourself with REAL Friends and discuss it with them and Finally I suggest You get Counseling.

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  4. Comment above.. "BRAVO" to you..(funny choice of word, huh) Well said.. I agree.. You and your "wife" have not been together for awhile now, so she has moved on and brought her man to court for moral support.. Maybe the problem is that you don't have anyone that can stand by you. And truth be told, stop airing your personal business on FB or in this blog... That is what you call disrespecting your kids and mother of your kids.. No matter what you should never bad mouth her, you loved her at one point to make babies with her. Ken dude get some help or get laid or something LMAO!

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  5. any woman that leaves her husband and runs off without her kids is worthless....just saying. she doesn't deserve the time of day. she sounds like a pig. go on with your life and forget her if she wants the kids for two weeks in the summer so be it. you can't control who she is with but you can let her know that if any other person says looks or acts in a way that doesn't benefit the children she'll never have them in texas again she can come to ny and see them in the precint. let her pay all the expenses. i went through a similar situation. i have full custody of my son and daughter the mother she pops up once in a while but she has no say or control. court issued. the botom line is you have to deal with this through the courts and don't ever let them see you sweat. hold your head everything always works out in the end....

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  6. fuck all these hater bitches on this blog... you can tell that allot of what is written here is written by baby mommas that use chil support as welfare lol..... lmao..... dude you move on when it's settled in your head. 16 year doesn't get erased so fast. mourn at your rate but don't mourn forever life will pass you by. hold you head up and tell these slum bitches to shut the fuck up.....

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