In September of 1981, I was accepted and began to attend the high school known as Seward Park. Back in the day, it was my zoned school so to say I was accepted is an exaggeration. Anyway, I had heard so much negative rumors about the school that I really didn't want to go to it.
As you are well aware, if you are a Seward Graduate, you know that you begin your Seward life at the Annex. As I entered the Annex, I hated it even more. There were days that I didn't even go! Of course, I probably still hold the All-Time cutting record. I hated the Annex. Nothing good there for me.
When I started the main, it was a whole different world. I felt like the Annex was boot camp, getting you ready for the main. The transition was much easier. I'm writing all this because I'm remembering the old neighborhood surrounding the main.
I remember the old Chinese lady that used to hang out her window chasing the spirits away. In fact, I know a few students that used to throw oranges at her from the school windows! I won't mention any names but you know who you are! LOL
I remember Guss Pickles on Essex Street as well as Economy candy on the corner of Essex and Rivington. I always had to grab a handful of peanuts from there. I tried giving ten dollars to his son for all those peanuts and he smiled. He said not to worry because his father knew it was happening and he didn't mind.
My first job was on Orchard St. for Kim's children's clothing. He expanded to leathers and stuff then his son took over. Nice guy. Now he has buildings on Orchard and is living the life. Speaking of Orchard, I remember haggling for a pair of jeans with the Jewish Owners. Since I was from the neighborhood I can haggle them down to practically free!
I remember that pizzeria on the corner of Essex and Delancey st. I remember the custodians of the school Billy and Butch. Great guys! Let us get away with murder. The weightlifting teacher Mr. Kessler who formed the group "Dogbrothers".
I remember acting in about 15 shows and directing a few as well. Apparently I was being called the Mayor of Seward even though I didn't see it. I remember having my car parked outside in front with a department of Education permit waiting for third period to fly to queens and get white castles. Yes I know Murder burgers!
I remember every single place in Seward that I was able to fool around in. I remember those friends that died since then and wonder would it have been different if they kept in touch. For an old man I'm remembering a lot of things.
I hope that I never forget them and I can share the stories with my friends and children for a very long time. If you read this and remember anything else add to it, Please!!! Thanks for listening!
Friday, July 29, 2011
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Bicycle Lanes
Okay people, I was holding on to this subject for a while but I know now that it's time. We need to talk about bicycle lanes. Mayor Bloomberg, in his ultimate wisdom, has decided to not only add but expand some major thorough ways to fit in bike lanes.
Now, i understand totally but I was told he did that because the head of transportation in his office rides bike to work and was having problems along the way. They totally destroyed Allen Street and now you can't even make a left to the Williamsburg Bridge off of Delancey street. you have to go all the way to Grand st and turn or go up Grand to Norfolk into more traffic.
the way I see it is that if it was to progress then fine, but it obviously has been counter productive. On top of that, if you have a car and double park on the bike lane, it's an automatic ticket. No Tolerance for it!!! C'mon, that's ridiculous. It's bad enough, DOT has every single Indian and Jamaican working for them. they have a nasty attitude too, like if we don't know they have a quota. Duh!
It burns my balls when I see a bicyclist riding his bike on the sidewalk almost hitting me and my daughter, while having the bike Lane not two feet from us. I mean, common sense. Then they have the balls to get mad at me when I yell at them to ride the street. I think that I will have to hurt somebody really bad if me or my daughter ever get hit with a bike.
I may be venting a little but this is why I started the blog. Bicyclists" Get off the freaking sidewalk and into your lane which has fucked up Manhattan already. if they made them then they should be used!! No? People, don't give anybody a reason to hurt you for something as stupid as that. Right now I believe that the only persons using the lanes are the Mexican delivery boys from the Chinese restaurants! I just had to say something!!!! LOL Funny but truth!!
Now, i understand totally but I was told he did that because the head of transportation in his office rides bike to work and was having problems along the way. They totally destroyed Allen Street and now you can't even make a left to the Williamsburg Bridge off of Delancey street. you have to go all the way to Grand st and turn or go up Grand to Norfolk into more traffic.
the way I see it is that if it was to progress then fine, but it obviously has been counter productive. On top of that, if you have a car and double park on the bike lane, it's an automatic ticket. No Tolerance for it!!! C'mon, that's ridiculous. It's bad enough, DOT has every single Indian and Jamaican working for them. they have a nasty attitude too, like if we don't know they have a quota. Duh!
It burns my balls when I see a bicyclist riding his bike on the sidewalk almost hitting me and my daughter, while having the bike Lane not two feet from us. I mean, common sense. Then they have the balls to get mad at me when I yell at them to ride the street. I think that I will have to hurt somebody really bad if me or my daughter ever get hit with a bike.
I may be venting a little but this is why I started the blog. Bicyclists" Get off the freaking sidewalk and into your lane which has fucked up Manhattan already. if they made them then they should be used!! No? People, don't give anybody a reason to hurt you for something as stupid as that. Right now I believe that the only persons using the lanes are the Mexican delivery boys from the Chinese restaurants! I just had to say something!!!! LOL Funny but truth!!
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Be yourself
Well, well , well...I see that this dating game is a little harder than I thought. I believe there comes a time where you should stick to what you want in a relationship/friendship regardless what is told to you. I mean, I know once you set a goal for something it's hard to be derailed from it but to offer you one thing and end up with another is really confusing.
Painting roses and rainbows in a relationship just to get someone interested is wrong on all accounts. I previously asked, what do you do if you meet someone that is too good to be true? Many of you wrote, Kenny, you must learn to trust again. Others said that If it seems to good to be true, it is.
Well, from my experience, it's the latter. If it seems too good to be true, it is. Maybe I'm not ready for any kind of relationship. Maybe I just need to focus on myself and my kids but isn't that what I previously said? LOL
Again, I think that the only "Kind" of relationship I need right now is a "FWB". Y'all know what that is. Oh well, until I find that one friend that is looking for the same thing, I guess I'll need a lot of vitamin E!
thanks for listening everybody! I love you guys.
Painting roses and rainbows in a relationship just to get someone interested is wrong on all accounts. I previously asked, what do you do if you meet someone that is too good to be true? Many of you wrote, Kenny, you must learn to trust again. Others said that If it seems to good to be true, it is.
Well, from my experience, it's the latter. If it seems too good to be true, it is. Maybe I'm not ready for any kind of relationship. Maybe I just need to focus on myself and my kids but isn't that what I previously said? LOL
Again, I think that the only "Kind" of relationship I need right now is a "FWB". Y'all know what that is. Oh well, until I find that one friend that is looking for the same thing, I guess I'll need a lot of vitamin E!
thanks for listening everybody! I love you guys.
Be yourself
Well, well , well...I see that this dating game is a little harder than I thought. I believe there comes a time where you should stick to what you want in a relationship/friendship regardless what is told to you. I mean, I know once you set a goal for something it's hard to be derailed from it but to offer you one thing and end up with another is really confusing.
Painting roses and rainbows in a relationship just to get someone interested is wrong on all accounts. I previously asked, what do you do if you meet someone that is too good to be true? Many of you wrote, Kenny, you must learn to trust again. Others said that If it seems to good to be true, it is.
Well, from my experience, it's the latter. If it seems too good to be true, it is. Maybe I'm not ready for any kind of relationship. Maybe I just need to focus on myself and my kids but isn't that what I previously said? LOL
Again, I think that the only "Kind" of relationship I need right now is a "FWB". Y'all know what that is. Oh well, until I find that one friend that is looking for the same thing, I guess I'll need a lot of vitamin E!
thanks for listening everybody! I love you guys.
Painting roses and rainbows in a relationship just to get someone interested is wrong on all accounts. I previously asked, what do you do if you meet someone that is too good to be true? Many of you wrote, Kenny, you must learn to trust again. Others said that If it seems to good to be true, it is.
Well, from my experience, it's the latter. If it seems too good to be true, it is. Maybe I'm not ready for any kind of relationship. Maybe I just need to focus on myself and my kids but isn't that what I previously said? LOL
Again, I think that the only "Kind" of relationship I need right now is a "FWB". Y'all know what that is. Oh well, until I find that one friend that is looking for the same thing, I guess I'll need a lot of vitamin E!
thanks for listening everybody! I love you guys.
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Funny as shit
Well, this was one of the funniest days I have experienced in a while! So, I'm sitting down stairs in front of my building in the projects with my friends. We are together shooting the breeze laughing, basically making fools of each other when my friend turns to me and asks me a question.
"What was Cornelius' wife's name on the "Planet of the Apes"?" I was trying to remember and I kept thinking it was Dr. Zurg or something like that. We were on that question for about five minutes when out of my building walks out a tall black man.
As he's passing by, my friend politely asks him, "Hey, you seem to be about our age and you would remember this. What was Cornelius' wife's name on Planet of the Apes?" He stops and at first looks at my friend like she's crazy but then answers "something Zur or something." That's what I said but he didn't know.
So he walks away and I look at my friend and ask her, "Just out of curiosity, why did you ask him?" and she did a spit take with her water and let out the biggest laugh you can ever hear. We were laughing for about 20 minutes. It was so weird. She didn't ask him for any other reason but that he was right next to us and about our age.
I think he was offended but it was too late. I almost pee'd my pants!!!!! It was too funny!1 For those that don't know, her name was "Zira".
"What was Cornelius' wife's name on the "Planet of the Apes"?" I was trying to remember and I kept thinking it was Dr. Zurg or something like that. We were on that question for about five minutes when out of my building walks out a tall black man.
As he's passing by, my friend politely asks him, "Hey, you seem to be about our age and you would remember this. What was Cornelius' wife's name on Planet of the Apes?" He stops and at first looks at my friend like she's crazy but then answers "something Zur or something." That's what I said but he didn't know.
So he walks away and I look at my friend and ask her, "Just out of curiosity, why did you ask him?" and she did a spit take with her water and let out the biggest laugh you can ever hear. We were laughing for about 20 minutes. It was so weird. She didn't ask him for any other reason but that he was right next to us and about our age.
I think he was offended but it was too late. I almost pee'd my pants!!!!! It was too funny!1 For those that don't know, her name was "Zira".
Thursday, July 21, 2011
WTF I have the right to ask!!
So, today I get up before my usual time so that I can take the opportunity to bath in cool water. I mean, the boys needed the cooling down! LOL Anyway, I know TMI, get over it! LOL Anyway, as I'm getting out I wake up my kids so that they can start their day off right.
Since my daughter has a trip to Mountain Creek Water Park, I decided to go through the rules of safety with her. You can never be too sure and not do the rules! As I'm going thru the rules, she tells me of a situation that happened last week at the other trip to "Adventure land".
Apparently, her counselor left her and her camp buddy on a ride and went to another. When she was done, she had to look for him and panicked a little. She felt better after finding him but I feel he shouldn't have let them alone to begin with.
So of course, this upsets me a little and I have to bring it up to the program director like I believe a good parent would. When the Program Director finally got the the site this morning, I approached him, said Good Morning and went on to tell him what my daughter had said.
Don't you know he got offended! He felt that I was constantly questioning his professionalism. Now, for you guys that know me, I backed up a little and I did something that I rarely do. I composed myself and answered him as calm and cool as I possibly can.
I told him that I didn't mean to offend but that my daughters safety is the most important thing. He said that if I had a problem with last weeks trip, I should have brought it up last week right away. I went on and explained that I just heard it this morning and If I had heard it last week I would have said something LAST WEEK.
He calmed to down when I told him, simply, if it ever came to a point where I had to choose my daughter or him, he would lose. It upset me because he didn't have to go there. I mean, isn't it my right to question my daughters caretaker? Even if its the smallest detail./ It's his job to reassure me that my daughter will be okay as many times as I ask.
That's how I felt. I should have broke on him but I didn't. I have a friend who is a senior camp counselor there and asked her to keep a small eye on my daughter just in case. She has been thru too much with the abandonment, she shouldn't have to go thru more with people that are getting paid to take care of her!!!!
My friends, should I approach this again in a business like environment or should I just let his attitude go?
Since my daughter has a trip to Mountain Creek Water Park, I decided to go through the rules of safety with her. You can never be too sure and not do the rules! As I'm going thru the rules, she tells me of a situation that happened last week at the other trip to "Adventure land".
Apparently, her counselor left her and her camp buddy on a ride and went to another. When she was done, she had to look for him and panicked a little. She felt better after finding him but I feel he shouldn't have let them alone to begin with.
So of course, this upsets me a little and I have to bring it up to the program director like I believe a good parent would. When the Program Director finally got the the site this morning, I approached him, said Good Morning and went on to tell him what my daughter had said.
Don't you know he got offended! He felt that I was constantly questioning his professionalism. Now, for you guys that know me, I backed up a little and I did something that I rarely do. I composed myself and answered him as calm and cool as I possibly can.
I told him that I didn't mean to offend but that my daughters safety is the most important thing. He said that if I had a problem with last weeks trip, I should have brought it up last week right away. I went on and explained that I just heard it this morning and If I had heard it last week I would have said something LAST WEEK.
He calmed to down when I told him, simply, if it ever came to a point where I had to choose my daughter or him, he would lose. It upset me because he didn't have to go there. I mean, isn't it my right to question my daughters caretaker? Even if its the smallest detail./ It's his job to reassure me that my daughter will be okay as many times as I ask.
That's how I felt. I should have broke on him but I didn't. I have a friend who is a senior camp counselor there and asked her to keep a small eye on my daughter just in case. She has been thru too much with the abandonment, she shouldn't have to go thru more with people that are getting paid to take care of her!!!!
My friends, should I approach this again in a business like environment or should I just let his attitude go?
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Bait and switch
How many of you guys remember the audio store on Delancey Street called "VicMarr"? They used to have one on Southern Blvd in the Bronx as well. Anyway, for those that were not local, they were famous for the ol' "Bait and Switch" routine.
They used to have a great system in the window at a great price and when you walked in to buy it, they conveniently sold out but have a much better product, of course, at a higher price. the scheme was tho, that even tho you were on Delancey street and knew you could haggle, they would drive the prices WAAAY up before you even got there so that you haggle to their price anyway. On top of that, they didn't put the prices on the merchandise, they put a code in. Only the salesman and a few locals knew what they were.
Has anyone ever experienced the ol' "Bait and Switch" technique in a relationship? I have a friend that is in a relationship but is now more confused than ever because he feels like he has been scammed. He's afraid that he wants out because she wasn't truthful from the beginning.
She made sure that she told him everything he wanted to hear before the relationship started, (Bait), then a couple of months after they got together, she started demanding things that she has been wanting to do in a relationship (Switch). He, however, doesn't agree with these things.
Now, I can't get into details because those that read this will automatically know who I'm talking about but maybe you can place yourselves in this situation and give an honest opinion. According to what he says, he really likes this girl. It may even be love and he doesn't want to disrespect her in any kind of way by denying her anything but he feels that he is being pressured to do something he may not be ready for.
She has been through a lot and I assume that she just wants to guarantee certain things in life but can anyone ever guarantee anything anyway? That's what I told him. I also told him that only God can decide what is best for him. I told him to place his trust in God and all will be well. I guess, tho, that's my faith and he thanked me for the advice.
If it was me, I'd be going by instinct and worry, as usual, of how it would turn out. For some stupid reason, I always try to look out for others and not myself. A habit I have to change sooner or later. I guess it's a self-preservation thing. LOL
What I'm trying to say, and I hope that the girl reads this, is that life is too short to be making plans for the future when NOTHING is guaranteed in this life. Place whatever wishes you have in God's hands and let him decide what is best for you. More importantly, please be honest with one another so that there are NO miscommunication in the future.
The "Bait" you put out will catch you a great person if it's true and coming from the heart. Therefore, no need to "Switch" or demand/place conditions on anything. Have a great weekend everybody!
Sir Ken Bravo! LOL
They used to have a great system in the window at a great price and when you walked in to buy it, they conveniently sold out but have a much better product, of course, at a higher price. the scheme was tho, that even tho you were on Delancey street and knew you could haggle, they would drive the prices WAAAY up before you even got there so that you haggle to their price anyway. On top of that, they didn't put the prices on the merchandise, they put a code in. Only the salesman and a few locals knew what they were.
Has anyone ever experienced the ol' "Bait and Switch" technique in a relationship? I have a friend that is in a relationship but is now more confused than ever because he feels like he has been scammed. He's afraid that he wants out because she wasn't truthful from the beginning.
She made sure that she told him everything he wanted to hear before the relationship started, (Bait), then a couple of months after they got together, she started demanding things that she has been wanting to do in a relationship (Switch). He, however, doesn't agree with these things.
Now, I can't get into details because those that read this will automatically know who I'm talking about but maybe you can place yourselves in this situation and give an honest opinion. According to what he says, he really likes this girl. It may even be love and he doesn't want to disrespect her in any kind of way by denying her anything but he feels that he is being pressured to do something he may not be ready for.
She has been through a lot and I assume that she just wants to guarantee certain things in life but can anyone ever guarantee anything anyway? That's what I told him. I also told him that only God can decide what is best for him. I told him to place his trust in God and all will be well. I guess, tho, that's my faith and he thanked me for the advice.
If it was me, I'd be going by instinct and worry, as usual, of how it would turn out. For some stupid reason, I always try to look out for others and not myself. A habit I have to change sooner or later. I guess it's a self-preservation thing. LOL
What I'm trying to say, and I hope that the girl reads this, is that life is too short to be making plans for the future when NOTHING is guaranteed in this life. Place whatever wishes you have in God's hands and let him decide what is best for you. More importantly, please be honest with one another so that there are NO miscommunication in the future.
The "Bait" you put out will catch you a great person if it's true and coming from the heart. Therefore, no need to "Switch" or demand/place conditions on anything. Have a great weekend everybody!
Sir Ken Bravo! LOL
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Holla!
So for years, probably since I was a teenager, I wondered why a liquor store was called "Liquor Store" and when you went to rich areas, they were called "Wines and Spirits". Why there were more located in the low income areas like LES (Back in the day), Harlem , Washington Hts. The list go on and on because there are more of us than of them.
I figured it out. Poverty brings depression. Depression brings escape and the need to escape brings alcohol as well as other drugs. It's a shame that we rely on those methods of escape rather than finding another. Part of it is hereditary. It's brought down from generation to generation. Like the welfare chain.
Once a family is on it, it will continue until the chain is broken. That's a whole other topic! Anyway, the reason I bring the "Liquor Store" conundrum up is because I was hanging out the other day and was looking at members of a church group walking around our neighborhood inviting everyone to the church.
It was part of a leadership youth group or something and I found it strange. I asked my friend, why were they focusing on our neighborhood instead of going towards, maybe Ave A, or somewhere where there are rich upperclassman? I believe that the people in our neighborhood don't need to find God because 98% of them already have God in their lives.
Especially with all the praying they do. In fact, I believe that there are competitions within the churches to change us from one church to the other. I've had Jehovah's Witnesses knock on my door, some Catholics and some pentecostal churches as well. I think that they think it's a free for all! LOL
As they were approaching the bench I was sitting on, I decided it's time for me to get up and call my daughter to go upstairs. I have very specific views on religion and I try to follow my grandfathers philosophy, Never discuss religion or politics. Many people follow that as well.
Back to the story, I get up and I whistle my usual whistle so my daughter, who was in the park by the sprinklers, knows I'm calling her. She looks at me and I wave her in. The girl from the ministry notices how I call for my daughter and asked me if that's the usual way I call her.
I said yes and she went on to say that it was a cool way of doing it and that she is going to implement the same thing when she has kids and wants to call them. Now, First of all, the whistle is region oriented as to say that, only certain whistles work and they are probably from the Lowa! Holla!!
Secondly, picture a young white chick, dressed in church clothes, whistling a whistle she heard from me. Wouldn't that be great?! I would like, for maybe one day, to be treated as an equal and tell these people to go preaching where the devil lies. With the Rich because us poor people have God in our hearts. If we didn't, we would not be here today. God bless you all!!!
I figured it out. Poverty brings depression. Depression brings escape and the need to escape brings alcohol as well as other drugs. It's a shame that we rely on those methods of escape rather than finding another. Part of it is hereditary. It's brought down from generation to generation. Like the welfare chain.
Once a family is on it, it will continue until the chain is broken. That's a whole other topic! Anyway, the reason I bring the "Liquor Store" conundrum up is because I was hanging out the other day and was looking at members of a church group walking around our neighborhood inviting everyone to the church.
It was part of a leadership youth group or something and I found it strange. I asked my friend, why were they focusing on our neighborhood instead of going towards, maybe Ave A, or somewhere where there are rich upperclassman? I believe that the people in our neighborhood don't need to find God because 98% of them already have God in their lives.
Especially with all the praying they do. In fact, I believe that there are competitions within the churches to change us from one church to the other. I've had Jehovah's Witnesses knock on my door, some Catholics and some pentecostal churches as well. I think that they think it's a free for all! LOL
As they were approaching the bench I was sitting on, I decided it's time for me to get up and call my daughter to go upstairs. I have very specific views on religion and I try to follow my grandfathers philosophy, Never discuss religion or politics. Many people follow that as well.
Back to the story, I get up and I whistle my usual whistle so my daughter, who was in the park by the sprinklers, knows I'm calling her. She looks at me and I wave her in. The girl from the ministry notices how I call for my daughter and asked me if that's the usual way I call her.
I said yes and she went on to say that it was a cool way of doing it and that she is going to implement the same thing when she has kids and wants to call them. Now, First of all, the whistle is region oriented as to say that, only certain whistles work and they are probably from the Lowa! Holla!!
Secondly, picture a young white chick, dressed in church clothes, whistling a whistle she heard from me. Wouldn't that be great?! I would like, for maybe one day, to be treated as an equal and tell these people to go preaching where the devil lies. With the Rich because us poor people have God in our hearts. If we didn't, we would not be here today. God bless you all!!!
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Court Date today!
So today I went to court and find out some very interesting things. First, they adjourned it for another date but I received some information today that kind of threw me off guard. I found out today that my ex-wife was sleeping with her new man while she was with me.
It made me very upset to be officially named a cuckold. For those that don't know what that means, it means Cabron. Then she has the audacity to say that I'm the conniving one! I mean, I would never do that to someone why was it done to me?
So, I'm going to take every one's advice and wish her the best of luck. Even though deep down I don't mean it, I wish her luck. Whatever. I'm getting tired of the nonsense with her. Born with the PATHOLOGICAL liar gene, she is not going to get far in her life that way.
I don't know what else to say except thanks to my friends, my true friends, for supporting me and having extra patience with me. Especially those that are implementing a little rough justice. Life goes on right? LOL
It made me very upset to be officially named a cuckold. For those that don't know what that means, it means Cabron. Then she has the audacity to say that I'm the conniving one! I mean, I would never do that to someone why was it done to me?
So, I'm going to take every one's advice and wish her the best of luck. Even though deep down I don't mean it, I wish her luck. Whatever. I'm getting tired of the nonsense with her. Born with the PATHOLOGICAL liar gene, she is not going to get far in her life that way.
I don't know what else to say except thanks to my friends, my true friends, for supporting me and having extra patience with me. Especially those that are implementing a little rough justice. Life goes on right? LOL
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Sunday Afternoon Sermon
The last time I went to Therapy, I was reminded of how I believe God works. It was shown in the movie "Evan Almighty". The scene where God, played by Morgan Freeman as a waiter/busboy, asks Evan's wife if when praying to God for Patience, does he give it or does he allow you to find and use it? Something like that.
I believe that God gave us free will so that we can, of course, make up our own mind in our life. He is there to support us. If someone asks for strength, God reminds us that it's already within us. If we ask him for Patience, he sits back and blesses us with knowledge to acknowledge the patience within us.
God, in his Almighty wisdom, allows things to happen in our lives so that we may learn and become better people from it. Sometimes, when you are not seeking him too much, things happen where you may find yourself praying everyday. Having full conversations with our Lord.
The enemy will tempt us always. It is up to us to decide what is best for us and what is not. It is very difficult sometimes to make the right decision but it has to be done. God is always taking care of us so when you find yourself down, know that God is right next to you holding your hand. Carrying you over the threshold of what is a problem.
The storm may come and go but God is with us always. I have learned that I cannot feel sorry for myself because God loves me. Unconditionally. It's a love that can be felt, heard, spoken. So, to my friends that are having some sort of crisis today or anytime, please understand that 1. there is a lesson to be learned. 2. God is ALWAYS by your side. and 3. In the end, like Bob Marley said, "Everything will be alright!"
I rarely say this to anyone so please take it for what it is: I Love You guys!!!! Enjoy your day!!!
I believe that God gave us free will so that we can, of course, make up our own mind in our life. He is there to support us. If someone asks for strength, God reminds us that it's already within us. If we ask him for Patience, he sits back and blesses us with knowledge to acknowledge the patience within us.
God, in his Almighty wisdom, allows things to happen in our lives so that we may learn and become better people from it. Sometimes, when you are not seeking him too much, things happen where you may find yourself praying everyday. Having full conversations with our Lord.
The enemy will tempt us always. It is up to us to decide what is best for us and what is not. It is very difficult sometimes to make the right decision but it has to be done. God is always taking care of us so when you find yourself down, know that God is right next to you holding your hand. Carrying you over the threshold of what is a problem.
The storm may come and go but God is with us always. I have learned that I cannot feel sorry for myself because God loves me. Unconditionally. It's a love that can be felt, heard, spoken. So, to my friends that are having some sort of crisis today or anytime, please understand that 1. there is a lesson to be learned. 2. God is ALWAYS by your side. and 3. In the end, like Bob Marley said, "Everything will be alright!"
I rarely say this to anyone so please take it for what it is: I Love You guys!!!! Enjoy your day!!!
Saturday, July 9, 2011
There's no crying in baseball!!
I don't know why but lately I've been kind of tearing when I see an inspirational movie. I get that little palpitation and it feels like the end part of a hiccup. A sigh. A breath. Maybe it's because I have been wearing my emotions on my sleeve or maybe covering them too well and they seek a way to be shown. Don't know.
All I know is that as I'm watching Men of Honor with Cuba Gooden Jr and Robert DeNiro, I start tearing and feeling proud when he starts the final countdown of steps and reminds him and the court what is a diver! Is that cheesy or what? LOL
It gets worse. I find myself looking around my apartment to make sure I'm alone when I know that I'm alone. I was watching, "How too train your dragon" and guess what? it brought tears to my eyes! A freaking animation.
The first time I ever cried at a movie was in an actual movie theatre. When I saw the movie "The Champ" with Ricky Schroeder and Jon Voight. Don't you know that when he died I cried like a newborn baby just got his ass hit! I was 11 years old but still.
Friends today make fun of others who cry at movies. They put up fronts because they feel its unmanly. Well, I have news for you, I've seen the biggest, toughest man I know cry at a movie. It makes you human not a , what was I called? Oh yes, A Pussy! LOL
Usually I answer them with a saying but you know what? I've learned that a little vulnerability turns a woman on. It doesn't hurt to bring out your feminine side. I admit I have one. I like Broadway shows, fine dining and I like rough housing too. A little slap on my ass helps me get going too! I guess what today's blog is that you are who you are.
When you show these emotions to others, they can see how you really are and determine for themselves whether they want to be friends or more than friends. That's when you see if you are compatible or not. So, for those that know me, don't make fun because I've seen some of you Negros crying too! For those that don't, look out because here I come!!!!
All I know is that as I'm watching Men of Honor with Cuba Gooden Jr and Robert DeNiro, I start tearing and feeling proud when he starts the final countdown of steps and reminds him and the court what is a diver! Is that cheesy or what? LOL
It gets worse. I find myself looking around my apartment to make sure I'm alone when I know that I'm alone. I was watching, "How too train your dragon" and guess what? it brought tears to my eyes! A freaking animation.
The first time I ever cried at a movie was in an actual movie theatre. When I saw the movie "The Champ" with Ricky Schroeder and Jon Voight. Don't you know that when he died I cried like a newborn baby just got his ass hit! I was 11 years old but still.
Friends today make fun of others who cry at movies. They put up fronts because they feel its unmanly. Well, I have news for you, I've seen the biggest, toughest man I know cry at a movie. It makes you human not a , what was I called? Oh yes, A Pussy! LOL
Usually I answer them with a saying but you know what? I've learned that a little vulnerability turns a woman on. It doesn't hurt to bring out your feminine side. I admit I have one. I like Broadway shows, fine dining and I like rough housing too. A little slap on my ass helps me get going too! I guess what today's blog is that you are who you are.
When you show these emotions to others, they can see how you really are and determine for themselves whether they want to be friends or more than friends. That's when you see if you are compatible or not. So, for those that know me, don't make fun because I've seen some of you Negros crying too! For those that don't, look out because here I come!!!!
Friday, July 8, 2011
Advice given is not always advice Taken.
I shouldn't even be talking about this. I'm the first one not to take advice. Well, that's not true. I like to look at other people situations and learn from their mistakes as well as mine. I have learned to appreciate other people's experiences and have used them to my advantage.
I just don't understand how people can ask for advice, be it directly or indirectly, and not take heed to any of it. Not even a small portion. In FB there's a member of my group that is in a very bad situation. She is in a financially restrained, abusive, disrespectful relationship and feels that she has to be there. As if there is no way out.
Most of the members in my group have given her excellent advise but she will not take it due to the fact that she will not leave her pets behind. Me, personally, sorry to say, but the pets have to stay. At least until I would get situated and If I had to go to court for them I would. Maybe leave them with a friend until then?
There was a time when I wasn't listening to my friends either. In fact, it was a party at my house. A pity party and the only one attending was me. My friends refused to feel sorry for me because they all new it would get better someday. I thank them for that.
I just want people to know that Life's lessons don't come cheap. Especially to those that have wronged you. Again, Karma. So, If you ask for advice and don't heed, not even the smallest part of it, then don't ask and don't expect things to change for you. I'm pretty sure some of them loved responding but I have to be tough here. NO ONE will be feeling sorry for you or will come and sweep you off your feet out of that hell hole. Sorry. just saying....
I just don't understand how people can ask for advice, be it directly or indirectly, and not take heed to any of it. Not even a small portion. In FB there's a member of my group that is in a very bad situation. She is in a financially restrained, abusive, disrespectful relationship and feels that she has to be there. As if there is no way out.
Most of the members in my group have given her excellent advise but she will not take it due to the fact that she will not leave her pets behind. Me, personally, sorry to say, but the pets have to stay. At least until I would get situated and If I had to go to court for them I would. Maybe leave them with a friend until then?
There was a time when I wasn't listening to my friends either. In fact, it was a party at my house. A pity party and the only one attending was me. My friends refused to feel sorry for me because they all new it would get better someday. I thank them for that.
I just want people to know that Life's lessons don't come cheap. Especially to those that have wronged you. Again, Karma. So, If you ask for advice and don't heed, not even the smallest part of it, then don't ask and don't expect things to change for you. I'm pretty sure some of them loved responding but I have to be tough here. NO ONE will be feeling sorry for you or will come and sweep you off your feet out of that hell hole. Sorry. just saying....
Thursday, July 7, 2011
My venting
Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, I extend my deepest apologies for my last blog entry. It seems that I was doing fine until , well, you know. Anyway, I want to thank all those that wrote back to me telling me how it is.
I know already where I have to be but do appreciate the advise and experience. Again, I was doing much better. I found myself smiling more and doing things that I won't usually do. Life is getting better for me, I just needed to vent a little so that I don't go out and commit a crime to release the anger.
So quickly I will say, I can always count on your honesty and appreciate your comments even tho you guys don't leave your names. Especially the one that said grow a pair! LOL that's funny, if you only knew!!!!
Have a good day Everyone!!! LOL
I know already where I have to be but do appreciate the advise and experience. Again, I was doing much better. I found myself smiling more and doing things that I won't usually do. Life is getting better for me, I just needed to vent a little so that I don't go out and commit a crime to release the anger.
So quickly I will say, I can always count on your honesty and appreciate your comments even tho you guys don't leave your names. Especially the one that said grow a pair! LOL that's funny, if you only knew!!!!
Have a good day Everyone!!! LOL
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
This single dad thing
You know, sometimes as I write I tend to hold tears back. They are not tears of sadness or pain but rather tears of frustration and anger. I was reminded this weekend that I shouldn't take credit for stepping up and being a single dad. I agree, kind of. The reason I may disagree is because single dads these days don't get enough credit. Especially since there are not as many as there should be.
Anyway, My anger stems from the ex wife. The woman that got up and left her family after 16 years without even trying to save the relationship. Not necessarily for me but for the sanity of the children. I know, I know, I shouldn't stay with someone for the kids but she never gave me an opportunity to find out.
I don't know of any mothers that would leave their families. Coward!!!! Why the fuck did you have the family if you couldn't handle it? Sorry people. This is my blog and my opinion and probably the only way for me to truly vent.
I love my kids to death. From the two of us, I won the children. She may have the freedom and the life but I have my kids. I'm proud to be a father and anyone that tries to take the glory out of that can kiss my ass.
I've also been advised to forgive the ex and forget. Well, that is most definitely easier said than done. How can you forgive someone that tore your heart out and bit into it? How can you forgive someone that has no problem in flaunting what they have to make you feel worse?
I was doing so good until I spoke to her today. I was happier and smiling more. Enjoying life regardless of how hot it is outside. I know what it is to hate and I feel terrible for hating. I don't have any other way to approach her and her actions. My only goal right now is to provide a happy life for my kids and to, every once in a while, enjoy the company of a beautiful woman.
What I'm basiaclly saying is that I don't forgive her. She doesn't deserve forgiveness because she has no heart. She is selfish and a liar. She has no remorse and doesn't realize that there are consequences for her actions. I said it before but my only solace is that Karma is a motherfucker and she'll pay for her actions in this life and the next.
God bless all the single dads that are doing a GREAT job with their children.
Anyway, My anger stems from the ex wife. The woman that got up and left her family after 16 years without even trying to save the relationship. Not necessarily for me but for the sanity of the children. I know, I know, I shouldn't stay with someone for the kids but she never gave me an opportunity to find out.
I don't know of any mothers that would leave their families. Coward!!!! Why the fuck did you have the family if you couldn't handle it? Sorry people. This is my blog and my opinion and probably the only way for me to truly vent.
I love my kids to death. From the two of us, I won the children. She may have the freedom and the life but I have my kids. I'm proud to be a father and anyone that tries to take the glory out of that can kiss my ass.
I've also been advised to forgive the ex and forget. Well, that is most definitely easier said than done. How can you forgive someone that tore your heart out and bit into it? How can you forgive someone that has no problem in flaunting what they have to make you feel worse?
I was doing so good until I spoke to her today. I was happier and smiling more. Enjoying life regardless of how hot it is outside. I know what it is to hate and I feel terrible for hating. I don't have any other way to approach her and her actions. My only goal right now is to provide a happy life for my kids and to, every once in a while, enjoy the company of a beautiful woman.
What I'm basiaclly saying is that I don't forgive her. She doesn't deserve forgiveness because she has no heart. She is selfish and a liar. She has no remorse and doesn't realize that there are consequences for her actions. I said it before but my only solace is that Karma is a motherfucker and she'll pay for her actions in this life and the next.
God bless all the single dads that are doing a GREAT job with their children.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Chinese guy
Okay, so I go to the hospital for my usual appointment and in my usual diabetic fashion, I have to pee. Okay, I'm looking around to see where was the closest bathroom and off I go! LOL When I open the door I see a middle aged Chinese man coming out of the stall. i walk into it because I like the room/space to pee and I see that he didn't flush.
that's fine. We are human. All we need tho, is maybe a push in the right direction to correct our faults. We are not all raised the same way, you know. So, Instead of peeing, I turn right around and get the Chinese man. By the way, I also noticed that he didn't wash his hands.
I tap him on the shoulder with my middle finger, keeping clear of his dirty hands as he turns around. I say, "Excuse me sir, maybe you didn't notice but you forgot to flush." He looked at me like I was talking German but held the usual smile they ALL carry when they don't understand you.
Personally, I think that's a cultural thing and they are taught that when they come to the United States. It's works 98% of the time in getting over most situations. Anyway, I told him again with no avail. The next time I told him , i found myself talking broken English. "you no flush!" and pointed to the bathroom.
He still apparently didn't understand. I have no problems with anybody but c'mon! I tried one more time but this time, i found myself kind of making fun of him. Don't know why, it just happened!! I very slowly told him, "YOU>>>>>NO>>>>>FRUSH!!!!! LOL
He still didn't understand. He apparently thought he was going to get away with it and started smiley then walking away. I said no way you're leaving without flushing. I tapped him again and with my finger I did the come here motion. He didn't move. Just smiled.
Little did he know that I know many people in the hospital. I saw my Chinese nurse friend and asked her to translate. She did and he still didn't move. In fact, he started yelling at her like if he was offended. I had to laugh. Look at the nerve of this guy. He's the pig and he's offended? Please!
My friend, the nurse, grabbed him by the shirt and put his ass in the bathroom. Waited next to him and had him flush. I reminded her that he didn't wash his hands and she of course, made him wash his hands.
It was funny as hell because as he left he had his head down, maybe of shame and right before he went into the exit staircase he said in perfect, New York English. "Thank You very much! You have a pleasant day!" "What!!!"
I pee'd a little in my pants. Couldn't help it! Had to go and was laughing so hard!! I guess he knew he couldn't get away with it! My nurse friend chased him down the stairs in good ol' Chinatown fashion! Even Funnier!!! SMH!!!
that's fine. We are human. All we need tho, is maybe a push in the right direction to correct our faults. We are not all raised the same way, you know. So, Instead of peeing, I turn right around and get the Chinese man. By the way, I also noticed that he didn't wash his hands.
I tap him on the shoulder with my middle finger, keeping clear of his dirty hands as he turns around. I say, "Excuse me sir, maybe you didn't notice but you forgot to flush." He looked at me like I was talking German but held the usual smile they ALL carry when they don't understand you.
Personally, I think that's a cultural thing and they are taught that when they come to the United States. It's works 98% of the time in getting over most situations. Anyway, I told him again with no avail. The next time I told him , i found myself talking broken English. "you no flush!" and pointed to the bathroom.
He still apparently didn't understand. I have no problems with anybody but c'mon! I tried one more time but this time, i found myself kind of making fun of him. Don't know why, it just happened!! I very slowly told him, "YOU>>>>>NO>>>>>FRUSH!!!!! LOL
He still didn't understand. He apparently thought he was going to get away with it and started smiley then walking away. I said no way you're leaving without flushing. I tapped him again and with my finger I did the come here motion. He didn't move. Just smiled.
Little did he know that I know many people in the hospital. I saw my Chinese nurse friend and asked her to translate. She did and he still didn't move. In fact, he started yelling at her like if he was offended. I had to laugh. Look at the nerve of this guy. He's the pig and he's offended? Please!
My friend, the nurse, grabbed him by the shirt and put his ass in the bathroom. Waited next to him and had him flush. I reminded her that he didn't wash his hands and she of course, made him wash his hands.
It was funny as hell because as he left he had his head down, maybe of shame and right before he went into the exit staircase he said in perfect, New York English. "Thank You very much! You have a pleasant day!" "What!!!"
I pee'd a little in my pants. Couldn't help it! Had to go and was laughing so hard!! I guess he knew he couldn't get away with it! My nurse friend chased him down the stairs in good ol' Chinatown fashion! Even Funnier!!! SMH!!!
Sunday, July 3, 2011
A small message
The following topic has made me wonder for many years and I'm pretty sure that there are a select few persons that would be able to answer my question with honesty and respect. At the young age of 9, my mother had a roommate. It was a very nice woman. Homebody, respectful and fun. I mean, at 9 years old all you are really looking for is fun, fun and more fun!
Anyway, This young lady wasn't the prettiest woman I've ever seen but, hey, to each there own. As the days went by, she brought into my house many gay men and lesbian women. I was introduced to the gay community at an early age. It never occurred to me that she was gay. It wasn't till after my mother threw her out that I realized she was gay.
I don't think I have to get into details regarding the situation. Let's just say that some alcohol was involved and some disrespect. long story short, she was out. The reason I bring her up is because some of her friends were dressed like men. I don't know what it was called back then but now it's called dressing aggressively.
I pushed it aside and continued with my life. In Seward, there were very and I mean very few girls that dressed that way. In fact, I think I may remember just one. So I wasn't around them to often. More gay boys than girls. Some of you know a few so we won't mention their names but I must say that even they were confused back in high school! LOL
When I started working for the Ryan/Nena health center, I was working around many of them. I believed that at the time, it was a requirement that you had to be gay to get the job on the "Educational Services" floor. Another fancy title for HIV services.
I was even accused of "Rapping" to one of the woman's girlfriend. I must admit, she was beautiful but I respected her situation. The lover threatened me to the point where I got mad and I told her simply, "Listen Melissa! You want to be dressed like a Man, I'll fuck you up like a man! Don't overstep because I didn't disrespect you. you need to respect me!"
My other coworkers came out and squashed the situation. I'm telling you, as I type these words I get a flashback. I would have fucked her up big time. I was was told that I have to tolerate the gay/lesbian community. I don't want to tolerate them. I needed to accept them. I believe there is a difference and I thought that I did until that day.
In dealing with many aggressive women, I've noticed that they don't like men. They don't trust men and they give men such a negative vibe that it makes men uncomfortable. Maybe it's just my specific situation but that's how I feel.
I had a very close friend that I met at my daughter's daycare. She was a beautiful person. Great heart. intelligent, I mean, the list can go on and on. At first she told me that she was bisexual. It didn't bother me one bit. We got even closer. She started seeing an aggressive woman and after a few months later, I never saw her again. I tried to keep in touch but to no avail.
I just found it very weird that after I met her partner, she wasn't talking to me anymore. The reality is that all I did was help her and guide her through some serious stuff. She was the one I asked, "Why do the masculine side of a lesbian couple dress like men, act like men but hate men?" She honestly saw what I meant but couldn't answer the question.
When asked about the gay marriage topic, I usually say what I say to a normal couple, fuck 'em! LOL If they want to know what it is to go thru the agony that is marriage then by all means. Good luck with that. I'm very comfortable with everybody but for some reason, I feel I pose a threat to Aggressive lesbians. I honestly don't mean to. I just do which by the way, was confirmed this Saturday past.
So, to rap it up, I guess, I want to send all the aggressive lesbian population a message. You want to be treated equally, then treat EVERYBODY with the respect you expect. You'll feel better and we'll feel better. Remember, Not all men want to sleep with your wife!!!!
Good luck with that!!
Anyway, This young lady wasn't the prettiest woman I've ever seen but, hey, to each there own. As the days went by, she brought into my house many gay men and lesbian women. I was introduced to the gay community at an early age. It never occurred to me that she was gay. It wasn't till after my mother threw her out that I realized she was gay.
I don't think I have to get into details regarding the situation. Let's just say that some alcohol was involved and some disrespect. long story short, she was out. The reason I bring her up is because some of her friends were dressed like men. I don't know what it was called back then but now it's called dressing aggressively.
I pushed it aside and continued with my life. In Seward, there were very and I mean very few girls that dressed that way. In fact, I think I may remember just one. So I wasn't around them to often. More gay boys than girls. Some of you know a few so we won't mention their names but I must say that even they were confused back in high school! LOL
When I started working for the Ryan/Nena health center, I was working around many of them. I believed that at the time, it was a requirement that you had to be gay to get the job on the "Educational Services" floor. Another fancy title for HIV services.
I was even accused of "Rapping" to one of the woman's girlfriend. I must admit, she was beautiful but I respected her situation. The lover threatened me to the point where I got mad and I told her simply, "Listen Melissa! You want to be dressed like a Man, I'll fuck you up like a man! Don't overstep because I didn't disrespect you. you need to respect me!"
My other coworkers came out and squashed the situation. I'm telling you, as I type these words I get a flashback. I would have fucked her up big time. I was was told that I have to tolerate the gay/lesbian community. I don't want to tolerate them. I needed to accept them. I believe there is a difference and I thought that I did until that day.
In dealing with many aggressive women, I've noticed that they don't like men. They don't trust men and they give men such a negative vibe that it makes men uncomfortable. Maybe it's just my specific situation but that's how I feel.
I had a very close friend that I met at my daughter's daycare. She was a beautiful person. Great heart. intelligent, I mean, the list can go on and on. At first she told me that she was bisexual. It didn't bother me one bit. We got even closer. She started seeing an aggressive woman and after a few months later, I never saw her again. I tried to keep in touch but to no avail.
I just found it very weird that after I met her partner, she wasn't talking to me anymore. The reality is that all I did was help her and guide her through some serious stuff. She was the one I asked, "Why do the masculine side of a lesbian couple dress like men, act like men but hate men?" She honestly saw what I meant but couldn't answer the question.
When asked about the gay marriage topic, I usually say what I say to a normal couple, fuck 'em! LOL If they want to know what it is to go thru the agony that is marriage then by all means. Good luck with that. I'm very comfortable with everybody but for some reason, I feel I pose a threat to Aggressive lesbians. I honestly don't mean to. I just do which by the way, was confirmed this Saturday past.
So, to rap it up, I guess, I want to send all the aggressive lesbian population a message. You want to be treated equally, then treat EVERYBODY with the respect you expect. You'll feel better and we'll feel better. Remember, Not all men want to sleep with your wife!!!!
Good luck with that!!
Friday, July 1, 2011
Friends?
As I watched the recorded TV show, "So you think you can dance" I was reminded of a special set of circumstances from years ago. They did a dance where the male got left at the alter and his best friend, the female, came and picked him up out of it and then ended up falling in love.
It was beautiful. Brought back many memories. Not of my present situation but rather a friend I had in the past. She is beautiful, smart and funny. Everything I look for in a woman. I opened my heart to her but she felt that we would ruin our special friendship if we were to further evolve into a couple.
I had always thought that I would marry my best friend. Ever since I was a young laddie and didn't know what love was. Years passed and she went her separate way and I went mine. We still keep in touch but we have our own lives to lead. It's one of the few regrets I have in my life.
I bring this up because I notice that there are many people around me and on social networks that are looking for love. You may be surprised. It could actually be right in front of you in the form of a friend, someone you like chatting with, or even someone you look for on facebook.
I say please don't rule out any possibilities just because you are hurt or have been deceived. Things happen for a reason and I believe if a door closes a window opens ever so slightly but its open. If I would ever notice the opportunity again, I will take it. Life's too short to be saying what if?
To the girl that I've loved before, I miss you. I still love you but I respect your situation. Just remember, you will always have family with me!!!!
Thanks For listening!! wow!! longtime coming!!!!
It was beautiful. Brought back many memories. Not of my present situation but rather a friend I had in the past. She is beautiful, smart and funny. Everything I look for in a woman. I opened my heart to her but she felt that we would ruin our special friendship if we were to further evolve into a couple.
I had always thought that I would marry my best friend. Ever since I was a young laddie and didn't know what love was. Years passed and she went her separate way and I went mine. We still keep in touch but we have our own lives to lead. It's one of the few regrets I have in my life.
I bring this up because I notice that there are many people around me and on social networks that are looking for love. You may be surprised. It could actually be right in front of you in the form of a friend, someone you like chatting with, or even someone you look for on facebook.
I say please don't rule out any possibilities just because you are hurt or have been deceived. Things happen for a reason and I believe if a door closes a window opens ever so slightly but its open. If I would ever notice the opportunity again, I will take it. Life's too short to be saying what if?
To the girl that I've loved before, I miss you. I still love you but I respect your situation. Just remember, you will always have family with me!!!!
Thanks For listening!! wow!! longtime coming!!!!
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