The following topic has made me wonder for many years and I'm pretty sure that there are a select few persons that would be able to answer my question with honesty and respect. At the young age of 9, my mother had a roommate. It was a very nice woman. Homebody, respectful and fun. I mean, at 9 years old all you are really looking for is fun, fun and more fun!
Anyway, This young lady wasn't the prettiest woman I've ever seen but, hey, to each there own. As the days went by, she brought into my house many gay men and lesbian women. I was introduced to the gay community at an early age. It never occurred to me that she was gay. It wasn't till after my mother threw her out that I realized she was gay.
I don't think I have to get into details regarding the situation. Let's just say that some alcohol was involved and some disrespect. long story short, she was out. The reason I bring her up is because some of her friends were dressed like men. I don't know what it was called back then but now it's called dressing aggressively.
I pushed it aside and continued with my life. In Seward, there were very and I mean very few girls that dressed that way. In fact, I think I may remember just one. So I wasn't around them to often. More gay boys than girls. Some of you know a few so we won't mention their names but I must say that even they were confused back in high school! LOL
When I started working for the Ryan/Nena health center, I was working around many of them. I believed that at the time, it was a requirement that you had to be gay to get the job on the "Educational Services" floor. Another fancy title for HIV services.
I was even accused of "Rapping" to one of the woman's girlfriend. I must admit, she was beautiful but I respected her situation. The lover threatened me to the point where I got mad and I told her simply, "Listen Melissa! You want to be dressed like a Man, I'll fuck you up like a man! Don't overstep because I didn't disrespect you. you need to respect me!"
My other coworkers came out and squashed the situation. I'm telling you, as I type these words I get a flashback. I would have fucked her up big time. I was was told that I have to tolerate the gay/lesbian community. I don't want to tolerate them. I needed to accept them. I believe there is a difference and I thought that I did until that day.
In dealing with many aggressive women, I've noticed that they don't like men. They don't trust men and they give men such a negative vibe that it makes men uncomfortable. Maybe it's just my specific situation but that's how I feel.
I had a very close friend that I met at my daughter's daycare. She was a beautiful person. Great heart. intelligent, I mean, the list can go on and on. At first she told me that she was bisexual. It didn't bother me one bit. We got even closer. She started seeing an aggressive woman and after a few months later, I never saw her again. I tried to keep in touch but to no avail.
I just found it very weird that after I met her partner, she wasn't talking to me anymore. The reality is that all I did was help her and guide her through some serious stuff. She was the one I asked, "Why do the masculine side of a lesbian couple dress like men, act like men but hate men?" She honestly saw what I meant but couldn't answer the question.
When asked about the gay marriage topic, I usually say what I say to a normal couple, fuck 'em! LOL If they want to know what it is to go thru the agony that is marriage then by all means. Good luck with that. I'm very comfortable with everybody but for some reason, I feel I pose a threat to Aggressive lesbians. I honestly don't mean to. I just do which by the way, was confirmed this Saturday past.
So, to rap it up, I guess, I want to send all the aggressive lesbian population a message. You want to be treated equally, then treat EVERYBODY with the respect you expect. You'll feel better and we'll feel better. Remember, Not all men want to sleep with your wife!!!!
Good luck with that!!
I disagree with you! You are generalizing that all Lesbians hate men. What you perceive may not be what it seems!!! There are many reasons why some women become Lesbians. Contrary to some ridiculous beliefs by homophobics,not all women become lesbians because they were raped by men or abused by their father...etc. Some become lesbians because they believe that this is the way they were meant to be! It is my understanding that when compared to gay men,lesbians may be more accepted in society than gay men (let me rephrase this... I am not saying that gay men are not accepted, just that lesbians may be accepted a little more). Men are considered dominant or more in power than females. Men tend to be bosses, get higher salaries than women -even though the woman may be doing the same job or she may hae a higher degree...etc (however, we are starting to see more females get into power and becoming bosses and earn higher wages). Society may accept lesbians more because they are perceived as trying to get up in the masculine world (or better yet,trying to gain equal power as a men)! For gay men, its the opposite, they're perceived as giving up his place in the dominant world (or moving down the ladder). I did not come up w/ this theory so don't shoot me! However, I think men who feel as you do, do so because you may feel uncomfortable or insecure towards them and/or feel that since they like women, they must hate men. They may dislike men as a partner, but to stereotype them and say that they all hate men is bias and irresponsible to say!
ReplyDeleteI think this is John. Anyway, That's not what I said. I said the lesbians that dress like men are the ones that hate men. As far aswhy they are lesbian, well, I must say that you don't have to be a Homophobe to believe that certain circumstances can change your life and an abusive family member or boyfriend can make that happen. I know 5 lesbians andthey all told me somewhat of the same history. I'm not judging, I just like to know for knowledge.
ReplyDelete